Broken!

       A week after I got home from my mission I made a small mistake (at least I thought it was small at the time). I tripped going down the stairs.  My foot hurt but I didn’t think it was badly injured, maybe sprained.  I thought I could take care of it myself and I didn’t need anyone’s help to fix it.  I thought since it didn’t hurt too badly I should try and walk on it (they say if you can put pressure on it then it’s not broken).  SO I tried this and it hurt but I could put pressure on it and I could avoid screaming.  The day went on and the pain intensified and my foot started to swell.  That night I couldn’t rest, the pain from my foot was too intense that I couldn’t get any peace.  The next day I gave in, the pain was strong for me to handle on my own, I needed help.  The doctor told me that it was broken and that it was worse than I had thought it was.  He said that my foot was not only broken it had twisted and parts were splintered off.   The doctor told me that in order to fix my foot he would have to do surgery on it.  However, because I waited it had actually gotten to swollen for him to fix it that day. So I would have to wait and even though it was embarrassing and painful I waited with my foot up for what felt like forever, it was only a week.   He even gave me some things I could do to help with the pain and some medication I could take.  Then I went in for surgery and the doctor fixed up my foot.  He had done everything he could do now it was up to me to heal.  He gave me some exercises and again some medication to help dull the pain and with that help I would be able to heal properly.

                Similar to what happened to my foot there are many times in our life when we make mistakes.  Sometimes we might think it’s not that big of a deal and that we can handle it ourselves.  We think we are strong enough to fix all of the problems on our own.  However, like my foot many times there are deeper wounds that we can’t even see from the surface from our supposedly small mistake.  We can’t see them on our own we need someone who has the power and training to help us see them and to help us fix them.  That is when we need to go talk to our bishop, our ward family doctor.   They are there to help us heal properly and see any damage that we might not be able to see for ourselves.  If you put off talking to him or think that you can do it yourself you might make the mistake more difficult to fix and in some cases (like in the case of my foot) you might make the damage worse.  Occasionally when the circumstances require we might need to wait, like I did with my foot for the swelling to go down, or in spiritual matters we might need to abstain from partaking of the sacrament.  Though this might be painful or embarrassing he is not doing it to punish you. He only does this so that the day when you do get to go and partake of the sacrament again you can do so and have your spirit be completely ready for to be fully healed.  It is all part of the complete healing process.

                Repentance isn’t easy and sometimes it’s a little painful but the Lord is there every step of the way helping you dull the pain.  The bishop might have you read some scriptures or do some specific things that will help you invite the spirit help your healing process.  The Lord works through the bishop, he has taught him everything that he knows and through this process we can be healed of all of our so called little mistakes.

                Now my scar is getting smaller but it will forever be there as a constant reminder of that small mistake I made.  Sometimes we might have a small reminder of the mistakes that we have made; we might remember what we have done.  This isn’t done to torture us and make us think that we really haven’t healed all the way.  We only have these small reminders there to remind us not of our mistake but of our healing.  My scar will always remind me not to make that same mistake again but not only that, my scar will always remind me of who I had to rely on in order to heal properly.  I know I couldn’t have healed on my own and I will always remember who I can turn to for help.  I alone might have made a mistake but I am never alone when it comes to fixing it.